The government is hiring TikTokers to deter migrants from Channel crossing, financial-advice columnist gets scammed & Alicia Keys avoids cringe by editing her Super Bowl halftime performance
The cringiest headlines of the past week according to yours truly.
Hello friend,
We hope you had a great weekend and that you forgive us for the late send-out. Our editor (👋) was busy admiring the nature and people of Windermere this weekend, but we promise today’s newsletter is just as weird as it would’ve been yesterday.
Now without further ado, let’s start off with our Would You Rather:
WYR get trolled after sharing your scammer story or have such bad breath that your dad creates a mouthwash?
Georjia: How bad does a scammer story have to be for people to troll it? The public are usually very caring and sympathetic when someone gets scammed (even when they’re scammed by a certain Real Housewife) but for people to essentially take the scammers’ side, you have to take a look in the mirror and think about what happened. Bad breath is ROUGH. I’ve never pointed out someone’s bad breath, but I have smelt it and in some cases, it could end in a dry heave. But at least someone who you care about is trying to help your problem! That’s a plus!! But for it to be noted on every bottle of mouthwash, I’d be embarrassed. I think I’ll take the scammer story trolling.
Annika: I’m all for a truly humbling story which keeps you grounded, and the scammed financial-advice columnist in question seemed surprisingly fine (financially speaking) even after losing $50k. Of course, I do believe that anyone could be at risk of getting scammed, and it’s almost a rite of passage to hear other people proclaim this would never happen to them. A scam can harm you for quite some time, and be especially detrimental amidst a cost of living crisis and recession, but bad breath doesn’t have to be for life if your dad finds a solution! I’d rather my dad announced to all his prospective customers that my bad breath inspired him; after all, they’d understand my predicament.
WATERCOOLER CHATS
Is your brain full of London Fashion Week content? Finding it hard to scroll anything else but Pinterest and Twitter and brendahashtag’s Instagram account to fuel your fashion fantasies? Need some help to fill in the gaps for what else has been happening online and offline lately? No worries friend, we got you.
Here are our favourite headlines you can bring up during conversations you’d rather not have:
This week’s WYR refers to:
people making fun of a good old-fashioned scammer essay that’s been making the rounds on Twitter, titled ‘The Day I Put $50,000 in a Shoe Box and Handed It to a Stranger – I never thought I was the kind of person to fall for a scam’. While anyone can be at risk of scamming (even the Cut’s own financial-advice columnist, author of the essay), many people were a little too shocked by some of the details in the story to truly believe it could’ve happened to them too, exhibit A:
this tweet which enlightened us of the story of Dr. Harold Katz, who created his TheraBreath formulas because nothing helped his own daughter’s bad breath. Nice dad but maybe not something to let him print on every bottle that’s now been sold to millions:
A headline so bizarre, you’d think it’s a scene staged by the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City: Jen Shah Reflects on 1 Year Behind Bars — and Poses in New Photo from Barbie-Themed Prison Pageant:
The latest Pop Bitch newsletter shared an absolute gem of an anecdote about last week’s Twitter villain Gregg Wallace. They report:
During the filming of an episode of MasterChef, the judges were presented with the contestants' dishes to taste as usual, but John Torode found himself quite flummoxed by one plate.
"I can't quite put my finger on what this dish reminds me of..." he said, ponderously.
"I can!" Gregg gleefully interjected. "It's me aunt's cunt!"
Even though the production team and contestants were well used to Gregg's brand of humour, this particular bon mot managed to stun the entire room into silence. Again, it failed to make the edit.Delighted at Olivia Coleman saying the word' ‘cunt’ when sharing her favourite swear word at the European premiere of her new film ‘Wicked Little Letters’. 😌
Jennifer Lopez told Variety that Ayo Edebiri apologised to her before their appearance on Saturday Night Live together because of a clip that had resurfaced of her joking that J. Lo’s “whole career” is “one long scam”.
Rod Stewart on Ed Sheeran: “I don’t know any of his songs, old ginger bollocks.”
The more we read about J. Lo’s self-financed $20 million documentary ‘This Is Me … Now: A Love Story’ about her love affair with Ben Affleck, the better it gets: Benny Medina, Lopez’s longtime manager, encouraged her to turn her reunion with Affleck into an album. As part of the process, she showed musicians a stash of letters her now-husband wrote for her, which he titled “The Greatest Love Story Never Told”. As the documentary reveals, this rather came as a surprise of Affleck himself, when he entered the room and found out for the first time.
This week’s palate cleanser: Sophie Ellis Bextor back on stage to perform ‘Murder On The Dance floor’ on prime time TV 20 years later.
Team Cringe mourns the loss of a normal and common human oopsie as people have pointed out that Alicia Keys’ Super Bowl halftime performance was edited before uploading online to cut out a moment when her voice broke.
Taylor Swift made us wonder whether we would also take our parents clubbing.
Surprised no one predicted this, but perhaps we didn’t think the Tories would ever stoop that low: The Home Office is planning to hire TikTok stars to post videos urging migrants not to cross the Channel in small boats. ITV reports:
Social media influencers will be offered thousands of pounds to post content deterring people in countries where migrants often originate, such as Albania, by talking about new immigration laws and the threat of deportation to Rwanda.
CRINGE MEME
In honour of the new London Overground names:
That’s it for this week! Feel free to let us know what cringe content, memes, and headlines you’ve been enjoying lately. Until then, we’ll see you in your inbox next Sunday!
Your Cringe Team x